Clearly you don't want to be taken seriously....

I've noticed when I look on Facebook that some people's names.... well, they just aren't a good look, you know? Well, perhaps you don't know what I mean. Let me explain:

I am talking about people's names on facebook. If you're using a middle name on facebook that is not your given middle name, more likely than not you should probably change it, because it is destroying your credibility and image, along with any chance for upward mobility (I kid, I kid). Examples of middle names on facebook include (these are not made up; I have actually seen these TODAY). And keep in mind that these are only a FEW examples:

-SwagDad
-StarTastic Swag
-Swag Outrageous
-Stupid Swag
-Swag So Mean

.... um, am I sensing a pattern of swag here? Yeah I thought so. Anyway, back to the list:

-Polo-wearin King
-Stuntin on deez hoez
-Beauty is Cursed
-Hatersluvme
-Haterproof
-DaMoney
-TooFly
-So. Fly Def

and finally, last but not least, it's a tie between

"Fresherthanyobabymama" and "Unfukwitable"


No. Comment.

I'm not trying to admonish anyone against spicing up his or her facebook name. A couple of my friends are DJs and their facebook names reflect that. That's cool. But if I were to take a lesson from this girl and become Danielle "Fresherthanyobabymama" Hayden, then clearly, I don't want to be taken seriously. And frankly, with a name like that, I might also be saying that I don't want a job. EVER.

Unless you're this person, you have no excuse for your terrible facebook name.

Do better.