Two choices: Be a conformist or an asshole

Despite my love of toilet humor and swear words (among other inappropriate, non-ladylike things), I am actually quite cultured and shit.  Whenever I am attending a play, an opera, a ballet, an orchestra performance, etc., of course there is the arrival of the denoument/climax and the standing ovation that almost always follows the conclusion of the performance.  I hate the unspoken but very real taboo that can come with remaining in your seat while everyone else in the audience rises and gives a thunderous applause that reverberates around the entire building, sometimes even throwing in a few "Encore!s" for good measure.  I always give praise when praise is due, and this almost always equates to me giving a standing ovation.  But every now and then, what I see onstage is only mediocre.  Or maybe it's good, but not worthy of a standing ovation.  I always clap, but a standing ovation should be reserved for the truly exceptional; I suspect that a lot of people just do it because that's what we're supposed to do.  It's like when I blogged about tipping at restaurants a while back.  I always leave a tip, at least 15% but usually more.  However, I don't like the fact that I must tip if the service was only so-so (I've heard some argue that you should tip even if the service was bad).  Again, I always tip, no matter the conduct of waiter/waitress  (sorry, the "server."  Everything is so fucking P.C. nowadays).  But why do we reward that which does not merit reward?

Anway, I digress.  Let's move away from tipping and back to standing ovations.  I used to always stand up if other people were standing up even if I wasn't particularly moved by anything I saw or heard.  Now, however, I stand my ground.  I'm going to be an individual.  Though you wouldn't know it from my rantings in cyberspace, I'm actually very, very nice, so it is not without reservation that I remain seated if I heard another shitty rendition of hackneyed pop lyrics.  I will not rise and expel the unnecessary energy of putting my hands together to laud a future reject on an American Idol audition episode.  I'm a kind person, but in this case, I'm an asshole not only in thought, but in practice.