Ladies & Gentlemen, The World We Live In....

Feeling a little breezy under there?

Apparently, some people don’t wear knickers when trying on wedding dresses.  I went to David’s Bridal a while back and like most bridal salons, the salespeople there are with you at all times, even in the dressing room.  I know they’re there to help and some people are fucking ‘tards and don’t know that you should be careful when trying on gowns, but it’s embarrassing to have some stranger see me barely clothed.  Because of this, I was very stiff when I tried garments on; plus it was hot that day and I was kind of sweaty.  I apologized to the saleswoman and told her the reason I was so tense is because I was very self-conscious about my body.  Her reply?  “Oh, honey, don’t worry about it.  You’re actually wearing underwear, so you’re all good.”  She proceeded to say something else about some people not coming with any drawers on and how underwear is “all that she can really hope for.”  Wow.  Has society become so uncouth that women would try on a wedding dress with no fabric covering your arse?  The audacity!  Just come back on a different day if you didn’t wear panties.  Or, since the David’s Bridal I went to (and most of the other ones nationwide) is in a fucking shopping center, why don’t you go next door and buy a pair of panties before your bridal fitting, hmmm?  Is it too much to ask that you not go into a fitting room in your birthday suit?  I don’t care if you got a Brazilian wax and you just stepped out of the shower.  It’s. Still. Gross.

Assumptions

     The objective of this post isn’t to attack people who are prejudiced; we all are in some way or another.  We make assumptions about people based on the way they look, dress, speak, smell, and whether or not they watch Jersey Shore.  I’m just writing this because the assumptions that some folks make about me when they see that I am pierced and/or tattooed are pretty funny and usually way off.  I’m not heavily modified; just a few holes and some ink here and there.  This has been going on since the seventh grade when I first got my second hole in my ears at the age of thirteen.  Some of the parents were horrified and concluded that I was a wild child and I had a mother who let me do whatever I want.  Neither one of those was true.  I was a straight-A student in all honors classes and my mother was (is) more strict than a lot of other mothers.  Meanwhile, the daughters of many of these uptight parents were busy getting average grades and getting felt up and fingered in pre-Algebra.  Their earholes may have been closed tightly but there were some other orifices that were widened that year…. Anyway, these assumptions continued all through high school.  I wore a little bronze eye makeup and some eyeliner in 9^th grade and a friend’s father stopped my dad to ask him why I was being “grown” and wearing all that makeup, implying that I was “fast” (though I didn’t even kiss anyone the entire time I was in high school.  True story.)  Meanwhile, his daughter wore no earrings but was experimenting sexually with other women and would later have her admission revoked from a certain university because of poor grades senior year.  Am I saying that having no earrings is directly correlated with mediocrity in academia and being sexually liberal?  No. Because that would be silly, right?  Exactly.  Having multiple piercings (and more recently, a couple of small tattoos) has nothing to do with how intelligent you are, how hard you work, or how much you fuck (if at all).

Note: for all new readers, this is not a picture of me.

     Now I admit, when someone is really into body modification, it does seem more likely that they’ll be left-leaning politically, be vegan, be less conservative in the bedroom, smoke weed, etc.  It’s normal to assume things, but try not to make conclusions or treat a person a certain way until you get to know him or her.  I’m a moderately conservative, intellectual, Christian “good girl” (er, mostly) who just happens to like putting art on my own personal canvas.  It’s not fun when people assume I’ll be a certain way because I’m black and I’m from Detroit; it’s also not fun when people assume that I’m wild because I have a slight rebellious side that manifests itself on this blog and on my body (though I do enjoy being perceived as “cool” or “badass” during an initial introduction and I try to make that moment last as long as possible until they find out that I’m kind of a square).