Wow! I Actually Agreed with a Feminist

      I don't identify as a feminist and never will, much less a radical one.  I respect them as human beings and they have a right to their views (much like the KKK); however, I do not agree with much of what they have to say.  WIth that being said, however, I always try to educate myself on issues with which I do not agree.  I read feminist materials and websites and attend feminist speaking engagements (as long as they're free) to hear the other side.  Likewise, I educate myself on pro-death penalty stuff, pro-choice stuff, extreme animal rights stuff, and everything else I am against.  It is important to consider other viewpoints.  While I may be against the following: radical feminism, the death penalty, abortion, and equating animals to human beings, I am educated enough about the other side to affirm my beliefs (or, on occasion, to challenge or change my beliefs).
     So recently, I was reading feministing.com, the largest feminist website in the country.  I visit this site on a daily basis, sometimes nodding my head in agreement, but most of the time thinking "These chicks need to calm the fuck down."  Anyway, feministing.com posted a link to this article, which I then read.  I found that I concurred with the author.  In short, men can't drink certain beverages in public for fear of looking gay, lame, or like a woman.  They are doomed to forever consume alcohol that tastes absolutely disgusting going down their throats, or otherwise be subject to intense (and unfair) scrutiny, which will result in one of two things:  a) ridicule, or  b) refusal to consider the cranberry & vodka man as a potential romantic prospect.  The chance of you taking a woman home with you if you're a man drinking something like this

or this

  or, well... any of these

decreases exponentially with each sip that you take.  

But it got me to thinkin'.  (Here's where that feminist stuff comes in; I wasn't just rambling at the beginning; it all ties in.  I promise.)  I started thinking about how much pressure is put on men to be "manly."  Why should he take that shot of Bacardi 151 instead of the Peach Schnapps that he truly craves? Indeed, there's a lot of pressure on women too, but you must admit that in today's society, it's a lot more acceptable for a woman to act like a man than it is the other way around.  Case in point: when I was little, I played football and hockey with my older brother, I loved the Packers (still do! Cheesehead 'till I die), I played Legos, and did other stuff that might be viewed as "boy-things."  Granted, I took ballet and had an extensive Barbie collection, so I balanced out my slight tomboyishness with sugar, spice, and everything nice.  But still, what if my brother had taken ballet, or played with Barbies and then "balanced it out" by playing football too?  Or what if he hadn't played football at all and had just played dress up and had carried a murse all through life?  That wouldn't have worked.  My parents, cool as though they may be, would have tried to dissuade my brother from dressing up Ken and dancing pointe.  They would have worried and would have tried to steer him away from all that girly stuff.

     The pressure we put on men is unfair.  I'll admit, I've certainly been guilty of this.  I've said "Man Up" many times before, which assigns a gender to the trait of being tough.  (Oh Lord help me, I sound like One of Them (feminists)).  I've definitely stopped talking to a few guys in the past (romantically) because they were not assertive enough.  "I need a guy who's going to be a man."  I would say.  I may not judge guys for what drinks they order at a bar like the article discussed, but I realize that I have some dealbreakers that involve a guy doing things that are typically associated with girls.  For example, if Boyfriend arched his eyebrows, he and I would not be together.  Sorry, but I feel that arching is something only chicks should do, unless the man has a unibrow,  And even then, he should only fix the unibrow and should not do any actual arching.  Anyway, the feminists made their point, and they made me think.  Damn it!!!  I hate when that happens (not really, but still; I don't like admitting they're right.)   

     Men are supposed to be tough, and buff,  sexually active with a lot of hot girls.  They have to eschew any and all things that could ever be perceived as "gay", which many times manifests itself by being as much of a homophobic tool as they can muster.  If men cry, they are seen as weak.  If men back down from anything, they are called pussies or bitches.  If they have issues related to the crotch area (penis size, erectile dysfunction, stamina, etc.), they are made to feel like less than a man.  Many men can't even order salads without getting a side-eye.  People laugh at stay-at-home-dads.  Society is a fucking mess towards men. Women too, of course.  We have it bad!  However, men don't have it easy either.  I'm glad many feminists realize that.  I was pleasantly surprised that they took a break from male-bashing to present that point.